Wednesday, October 14, 2015

You Deserve A Drink (Don't Mind If I Do!)

I am not in any way, shape, or form similar to Mamrie Hart.  We are like polar opposite personalities. She did and does things that I would never, ever, ever, ever do.


I think that's why I loved this book so much.  It was vicarious living.  Reading about the hilarious drunken routs but suffering no ill side effects myself!

Confession: I had no idea who Mamrie Hart was until I saw this on Amazon and was like, "Ooh, drinky comedy book!  I want!" and then I ordered it from the library.  My YouTube viewing consists solely of relaxation videos, makeup tutorials, and the occasional flashback music video binge.  Mamrie Hart is friends with Hannah Hart (no relation), whose book My Drunk Kitchen I reviewed and disliked.

Thankfully, Mamrie's book is hilarious--like pee yourself hilarious--and crazy and full of really tempting drink recipes.  There's this one with jalapeño-infused vodka that sounds right up my alley.

This is a hard book to properly review because a) I read very little nonfiction and b) how do you talk about amazing essays about (RUTABAGA!)* drunken pole dancing while half-blind from the loss of your contact?  Even if all of this is embellished, Hart is still funny as flip.  She also has some awesome thoughts about body acceptance that I really needed.

Most alluringly, I have not done any of the things Mamrie describes in this book.  Not a one.  Never lived in Brooklyn.  Never bartended.  Never had Topless Tuesdays while at college--doing crafts in the buff and loving your body for just being there.  Never smoked pot and ate Blizzards at DQs in 4 different states because MUNCHIES.  Never carried the ingredients for shots in my backpack.  Never passed out from alcohol.  (There was that one time when I thought I drank too much--2 martinis!!!--but it turns out I'd developed a shellfish intolerance!  Hello, porcelain!)

Wow, do I sound like a Puritan or WHAT?  But I'm cool with that.  Like I said, I get to see what happens when you do all those things, but I don't have to suffer the consequences when I read it in a book.  And Mamrie legit doesn't care what you think.  She looks back at passing out in someone's yard or wiping herself with poison ivy and says, "Yeah, I did that."

So here's how it's gonna go down: you read this book, and I'll go to the store for mason jars to start infusing the bottle of vodka I have on my bar cart.  It's a win/win situation.

*You'll get it if you read the book.  So now you have to read it.  Ha.

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